A.
Whenever a child develops a fear, it is crucial to accept
it. If you are tempted to shout at his aversion to baths,
think about your own fears and the way you feel when you
confront them. Never resort to force, because it can have
a long lasting hatred towards bathing. Give up bathing,
if necessary and switch to a sponge bath temporarily.
Try to analyze the root cause of the fear. Whether he slipped
or hurt his head or urinated in the water or whether soap
went in his eyes. If you can pinpoint the source of your
child's aversion to taking bath, talk to him and tell him
you understand him. Comfort him as far as possible. A child's
fear passes off as quickly as it arrives, if it is handled
tactfully. Divert his mind by making him play with bath
toys. Make bath a fun time. Focus his attention on playing
and not on having a bath.
Q.
How
do I get my toddler to sit down on his chair and eat ?
A. Even the most
appetizing meal is hard to swallow, when it is offered in
an unpleasant environment. Make certain the environment
is relaxing. Eliminate any kind of distractions that may
keep your child from eating. Be it the television or other
children playing near the dining area.
If your child is willing to sit at the table and eat, encourage
him to do so. He may not do it for a short while, but keep
trying. Your child may sit on the chair and eat a bit since
he is hungry. So encourage his enthusiasm for food and his
new independence to eat.
Instead of serving mountains of food, which can overwhelm
and intimidate him, causing a toddler to give up eating
even before starting, give small portions of each food.
Limit liquids, too much to drink between and during meals
can leave a tummy too full of fluids, to fit in any solids.
Do not press him to eat more than he wants. Do not make
him stay at the table when he is finished. One day he will
understand that it is good manners to stay put, until others
have finished eating. Do not try to enforce this rule now,
you will only risk his happy eating.
Q. My
son hardly ever eats, and when he does, he does not take
more than a bite or two. He has been growing well according
to his doctor, but I do not see how long he can keep that
up, without nourishment ?
A. Nearly every child is a
picky eater at one time or another especially between
the age of 2 and 6 years. A healthy child will not starve
himself. Trying to force a child to eat is a losing battle.
Your goal should be to make eating a pleasure and not
a power struggle.
Study after study has shown that given the opportunity,
healthy children whose eating habits have not changed
inspite of parental pushiness will neither starve nor
over feed themselves. They will eat as much as they need
for normal growth. It is the parent's job to provide nourishing
food.
There are practical ways to handle a picky eater. There
are some workable solutions to most common mealtime battles.
a.
Avoid morning
rush : Children do not feel like eating when they
are rushed or upset. Start the day a little earlier,
so the child does not feel rushed.
b.
Offer non
traditional foods during breakfast : A peanut butter
sandwich or a slice of pizza instead of a standard
cereal.
c.
Practice
what you preach : Children imitate their parents action.
If a parent skips a breakfast meal, so will the child.
One of the best ways to encourage children to eat
well, is to be a good role model.
d.
Do not push
: Do not assume he is hungry, just because it is meal
time. Always ask the child if he is hungry.
e.
Give smaller
meals at more frequent intervals : Serve smaller portions.
Your child will be more responsive, if he does not
perceive, that there is too much food in his plate.
Q.
My baby keeps pulling at the ear. How do I know if he has
ear pain?
A. Babies are very susceptible
to ear infections because their eustachian tubes are short
and narrow. Most of them, eventually outgrow this susceptibility.
Symptoms
1.
Ear
pain, which is worse at night, baby pulling at her
ears or holding them crying, or refuse to suck the
breast may indicate ear pain
2.
Fever
which may be slight or high.
3.
Fatigue
and irritability.
4.
Nausea
or vomiting.
5.
Loss
of appetite.
6.
Occasionally
there may not be any symptoms at all.
Complications
that arise due ear pain
1.
Because
of the child's crying the pressure can burst the eardrum,
releasing pus into the ear canal, resulting into Acute
Otitis media. Treatment should be given with antibiotics
to prevent further damage.
2.
Hearing
loss - which is temporary, but can become permanent
if the condition persists for many months untreated.
3.
Mastoid
Infection.
4.
Meningitis
bacterimia, pneumonia.
5.
Brain
Abcess and Facial Paralysis.
Season
All the year round, but it is much more common in the
winter, and usually follows a cold or 'flu.
Prevention
There is no sure way to prevent infection, but the following
may reduce the risk of baby's falling victim
1.
Overall
good health through adequate nutrition, plenty of
rest and regular medical care.
2.
Breastfeeding
for atleast 3 months.
3.
An
upright feeding position, especially when a baby has
respiratory infection, or an elevated sleeping position
(putting pillows under the babies head and of mattress)
when the child has a cold.
4.
Decongestants
for children with colds or allergies, particularly
before an air flight. Make the baby suck on breast
or bottle during take off and landing, as most ear
problems occur then.
5.
Low
dose of antibiotics (as prescribed by your doctor)
for children with frequent ear infection.
6.
Smoke-free
living space.
Chances of
recurrence
Some babies may not have any episode of ear pain, and
some may have 1-2 episodes of pain with no repeats and
others may carry on the infection repeatedly into toddlerhood
and preschool years.
Diseases
with similar symptoms
1.
Any foreign
body in the ear may cause ear pain.
2.
Ear pain
is very commonly seen in swimmers.
3.
Any respiratory
infection can mimic a ear ache.
Q. My
child has developed the habit of biting people. Why does
he do this and how can I prevent it?
A. Children,
too express their feelings especially negative feelings
(such as frustration, disappointment, anger) in different
ways. Biting, may be the choice of weapon. As they cannot
express it verbally so they use primitive ways like biting.
Frustrated by their inability to manipulate their environment
or make their needs and desires clear and aware that their
words won't have that effect, they simply resort to biting.
Children really can't put themselves in their victim's
shoes, usually they don't even realize how much it hurts
the other child.
Reason for biting
1.
Too much
restraint and control at home.
2.
Sibling
jealousy which carries over fear and resentment to
all other children, as if they are competitors.
3.
Too little
chance to get used to other children and imagines
them to be dangerous and threatening.
4.
Tactics
to receive more attention.
Strategies
that can help diminish biting
1.
Sometimes
a child bites since he's hungry. Provide a nibble
to prevent biting.
2.
Give him
lots of positive attention when he is behaving well.
3.
Try to redirect
his attention to another activity.
4.
Make him
feel wanted if he feels threatened by his younger
sibling.
5.
Prevent
biting your child's toes or finger playfully or allow
the toddler to take a nip.
Q. My
toddler insists on being carried, even though he can walk.
I am concerned if he is getting too dependent?
A. Walking is a novelty
for toddler, when he first puts one foot in front
of another. Every step he takes, deepens his tender feelings
of pride and accomplishment. Then the novelty wears off.
Walking then starts to be a responsibility - something
that was expected, and often required of him. True to
his two year old negativity, he began to respond
to parental pressure to perform with
refusals. "If they want me to walk" he may reason
"that's probably a good enough reason not to walk"
and this makes him cling to his parents to carry him.
Suggestions to make your toddler back on his feet :
1.
Make
the walk recreational : Divert the child's minds from
the task of walking by pointing out interesting sights
on the road, playing games ("lets see if we can
step over all the cracks") or singing songs.
2.
Appoint
him your assistant : Toddlers love to be helpers.
When you are walking to the shop, ask him to carry
the shopping list, and also give him a small light
bag of purchases on your way home, in order to make
him feel "big".
3.
Try
not to rush or push him : Never try to rush or push
your toddler as his walking strides are much smaller
than yours. Give him enough time to walk in his own
stride pattern. However if he feels tired or goes
limp and tries to sit in the middle of pavement, then
it is advisable to pick him up and carry him.
4.
Praise
his efforts on two feet : After a walk, congratulate
him and tell him how grown up he is getting,and point
out that walking is one of the many fun things he
can do now, that the babes in the arm cannot.
5.
Do
not criticize his failures : Don't call him a baby
or fuel any possible existing jealousy by telling
him that you cant carry him because you are pregnant
or because you have to carry the infant sibling.
6.
Make
a deal : If the walk is too long, then try cutting
a deal "you walk this street, I'll carry you
the next". Alternate until you are home free.
7.
Set
an active example : If everyone in the family walks
a lot, eventually your child will too especially if
you don't make an issue out of his reluctance now.
Q. My
child has a habit of hitting other children. How can I stop
this ?
A. Hitting is very common
at all ages, but it should never be encouraged but can
be stopped in the following ways :
1.
Provide loving,
consistent and firm care to your toddler.
2.
Make sure that your toddler
knows that hitting is not in the rules for children.
3.
If the hitting
tends to become aggressive, then the behaviour
of the child should be observed,
and if necessary counseling may be done.
4.
Try to keep
the child out of a situation, where he tends
to start hitting.
5.
Never, under any
circumstances, try to hit your child
to teach him a lesson. Some parents do this to show
the child "how it feels" and it only encourages
the child to think that hitting is o.k.
